It was yet another 4-5 hours of travelling into Prey Nob, where the Goducate home is, our "home sweet home" for the next 5 days of camp. We didn't do much, split ourselves into our camp groups, talked to the children, rested, and off we went to the beach at Sihanoukville. It was beautiful! And once again, the splendour of the sunset just took my breath away. We'll never see such a ball of brilliance here, sadly.
That night was the worst I had in Cambodia. For some reason, I felt extremely homesick, I missed the people back here so much, I felt really lonely deep down, and I just yearned so much to fly back to Singapore and bathe in toilets with doors (lol). Thank God for the sharings during the de-brief, that really rebuked my heart. I'd unknowingly allowed high-and-mighty thoughts to cloud my mind. Thank God for the reminder that I'm in no way superior to anyone anywhere, even if I'm richer in possessions or just happen to live in a country with better living conditions. God made us all the same, He loves us all the same, and He wants us to love as He did. Whatever happened to what my focus should be? Of course, not forgetting what Lilis said, which probably impacted most of us, me included, the most. We can be swept off our feet by the magnificence of the sunset, by the vast amounts of stars in the sky, we can be so awed by them. But what about people, whom God has made even more beautiful than the sun and the stars. Do we even take a moment to think of the unsaved souls out there that God so dearly loves, or are our minds just occupied with images of nature... Which made me think, perhaps, it was more sympathy than grief, more indifference than care, more emotion than love...
God will make a way,
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way, He will make a way
By a roadway in the wilderness, He'll lead me
And rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His Word will still remain
He will do something new today
I lay awake for the longest time. There were so many people who'd be content with just a slice of bread, yet there I was complaining that the toilets had no doors, there was no hot water, the rice was too hard, the room was so hot, the place was so dirty... And a million more things. I was tempted to do something, but thank God for the voice within that told me not to. Because God always wants us to go to Him. First. I lay there, tears flowing, and I really talked to Him.
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